dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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