Your face is a jimmy john
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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