it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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