This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
