I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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