You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize