3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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