Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Less talking, more tequila
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
