69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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