remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
