so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
