he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
what day is it and did you see me today?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
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