I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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