He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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