I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
