I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
