i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
