i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
