No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
