Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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