Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
