Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Who put my cat in the fridge?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
