We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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