Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
