awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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