This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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