you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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