Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
