I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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