So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize