i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
