If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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