Having a random hookup so left but love u
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Randomize
