he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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