You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
