Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
