The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
