Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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