dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
