i just google imaged poop.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize