I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
