I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
