do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
