Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
