Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
