we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Randomize
