Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
