your room smells of hookers.
And success
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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