How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
