Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize