Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I am available for nakedness
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
